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[19 May 2005|06:13pm] |
So its been a really long time since i have last updated this stupid thing. I never really have the time or the desire to write. I guess I'm lazy...but I am who I am, and I dont really care.
Yuh, so whats new. wellll I'm currently in Texas visiting Patrick who moved here uh lets see january? yeh i think so. yeh well i've been here for a week now, and its been kick ass to say the least. its always fun to see new places and experience new things. I decided to come visit and see if I like it here, since my sister just got engaged and her fiance will be moving in to our apartment, that means I'm out. So these are my options, look for a place with nick or Derrick, or move here with patrick. i really dont know what i want to do yet.
School is done for the semester,I did decent. I quit chili's and am just working at the surf shop and giving lessons on the side.
Mel is talking to me again. we talked online for a while the other night and then she let me call her, and we had an AMAZING conversation. hopefully this means we will continue to be friends, and then go from there. all i know is i'm not going to screw things up this time. i'll do whatever it takes.
I really love my friends, but sometimes i really cant stand them. mainly its just that we are all so different. yeh we have alot of the same interests but at the same time, they are completely different from me. I have different views on things. they rag on me for be so compassionate, and for actually caring about things. but thats just the way i am. they think i just need to not give a fuck and do my thing, but i cant.
this was really random and pointless.
alright i'm gonna go get in the shower and then me and patty boy are going to hit the movies...PEACE!
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[13 Feb 2005|02:11am] |
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I've been sitting here with many things running through my mind. I began writing this entry and i stop and restarted it over 4 times. there were so many things i needed to say to get off my chest. but i felt that if i saw those words written down then it would alow me to feel. and feeling is not something i want to do right now. i want to reamian numb. its easier that way. i cant seem to get the words out. i think i need to sleep and try again later. g'night
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[31 Jan 2005|02:37am] |
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well howdy ho!!! how is everyone? hope christmas was good for ya'll. i know mine was quite splendid. canada has been a so much fun. very relaxing. its been awesome to see all of my old friends from highschool, and of course my fam. i really miss it up here. i love how you actually get to see the seasons change. its so differnt from fla where its always the same. me and my sister have been hanging out alot lately. its been great. we never do that at home. we're both always so busy. but we have the same group of friends so you'd think i'd be sick to death of her. i cant believe tomorrow is already new years eve. the year went by so fast. its so strange how fast time goes by as you get older. when you were a child it seemed as though time was in slow motion. but now that your older, time changes in the blink of an eye. Tomorrow my friend alex is having a party at his lake house. so we're all going to party into the new year at his place. lookin foward to it. i went to the doctor today to get my leg looked at, they took off the cast and took an x-ray to see how its healing. so far so good, they put a new cast on, but i only need it for a few more weeks till it can come off. i still have to keep the pin in though. oh well its straight. i cant wait to get home on the 10th. i'm already homesick, i miss my bed. there's something going on with mel and i'm not sure what it is. she's been very distant. what did i do wrong???
Well i just want to wish everyone a happy new year. but please be safe...
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| Well tickle me pink, cuz im the pink panther BITCH!! |
[08 Dec 2004|04:01pm] |
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 pessimistic |
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music |
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Senses fail |
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Could things be anymore boring? i think not. if that were possible then i'd surely die of boredom. i've been in the most pessimistic mood lately. I guess it the fact that i'm pretty much stuck indoors except for going to classes and such. So I'm almost done with finals. I have one more left tomorrow then i'm DONE!and i can start my winter break. too bad its not going to be much of a vactation. we're going back up to canada for christmas, yet this time i'm not looking foward to it. there will be absolutely nothing to do. all my friends will be out frolicking in the snow. while i'm stuck indoors with my and phillis who is the devil! i swear she reminds me of roseanne, with that annoying nails on the chalk board kinda voice. i plan on listening to alot of music, my headphones will be permantently attatched to my ears by the time i get home. Yesterday me nick and derrick went and checked out a few appartments and townhouses in boca. I want to move closer to school, i'm sick of the drve everyday and sick of my sisters shit. this will make alot of things easier. i'll be closer to school, closer to friends, have my own place, and closer to mel. she wont have to be afraid to call,and wont have to deal with my sister anymore. she'll just have to deal with obscene comments on the other end of the phone from derrick. but you gotta love him. there were a few plces i really liked. we're going looking for more later today.
I stumbled across this poem, and for some reason it really got my attention...
I open my eyes
I try to see but I'm blinded
By the white light
I can't remember how
I can't remember why
I'm lying here tonight
And I can't stand the pain
And I can't make it go away
No I can't stand the pain
How could this happen to me?
I made my mistakes
Got no where to run
The night goes on
As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?
Everybody's screaming
I try to make a sound
But no one hears me
I'm slipping off the edge
I'm hanging by a thread
I wanna start this over again
So I try to hold onto
A time when nothing mattered
And I can't explain what happened
And I can't erase the things that I've done
No I can't
How could this happen to me?
I made my mistakes
Got no where to run
The night goes on
As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?
I've made my mistakes
Got no where to run
The night goes on
As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?
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[30 Nov 2004|12:18am] |
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So how was everyone's thanksgiving? mine was just fine and dandy thank you very much! Went up to ontario on wed. to see my family. it was good to see them. havent been back up there in a while. well thursday i pigged out, slept, ate and then slept some more. it was awesome. then the rest of the time i hung out with friends and we drove over to the resort and went skiing and snow boarding. we stayed there the rest of the trip. i was doing quite well. hit some really good slopes. went intertubing, and hit the snow sleds for a while. the trip ended badly when i wiped out snowboarding and broke not just my leg but my ankle as well in two places. Sucks ass! I though oh yea wont be so bad, at least now i wont have to work..haha guess again. i dont have to work at chili's but i do have to go into the shop. and then what makes things evern worse is that now i cant surf for god only knows how long till this shit is totally healed up. man just shoot me now. its looking like a long winter with my couch and the remote control. Bakesale is out for me unless some one is nice enough to get me a wheel chair and push me around all day. Just call me gimpy from now on...PEACE!
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[22 Nov 2004|10:18am] |
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SEPTEMBER:
Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people's mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves sports, leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.
Damn that is me completely!
In other news... I've been so busy as of late. with classes and work, and giving lessons. I havent had much time for anything else which sucks major balls. I'm exhausted and need a break. Was supposed to see mel this weekend but turns out my rents are flying me and Kat wiht them to Canada for turkey day, leaving wed. and coming back sometime sunday. I'm happy to go see my family though, but bummed that i'm letting mel down once again. its seems like its been one dissapointment after from me to her. well its time for that to change. I'm totally stoked for bakesale, just got my ticket in the mail the other day. looks like derek wants to join all the cool people and make a lj and join myspace after he saw mine. so keep a look out for him. but i wouldnt add his sorry ass. haha juuust kidding. well i'm out. PEACE out homies!!
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[15 Nov 2004|11:32pm] |
One of my professors read a quote today that really got me thinking:
"When you were born you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die, you're the one smiling and everyone around you is crying." but i would rather have everyone smiling and laughing when i die, so when i die think of these quotes right here...
Never pass up anything that is free, except candy from a stranger and sex from a prostitute
Her kisses left something to be desired -- the rest of her.
They say it's a sign of greatness if you laugh at yourself- i laugh at myself all the time so therefore i'm the GREATEST!!
~this is Ryley signing off...FAREWELL my friends
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| I'm moving to the keys...well not really. |
[08 Nov 2004|03:53pm] |
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oh wow i havent updated this thing in a long time. i thought it would be kinda cool to have one, but i just never have time for it. oh well lets see whats been goin on lately. Wellllllllll went to the keys this past weekend. and let me just say how awesome that was. the condo we stayed at was so cool. it was about three stories, well two with a loft. and on the upper deck on the first flooer was a hot tub that i swear could have fit like 20 people in it.Or as derrick said 19 girls and him. I hate rich people. well i cant say i hate them i should just say i want to be them. we had thw hole place to our selves it was so sweet. we walked around key west and went to some bars the first night. and then went back to the condo with some beer and just hung out with just us guys. patrick invited some friends over and then it turned into this small party, we played some drinking games and i got trashed. i dont really remember much of that night. then we woke up before daylight and went down to the beach, we had our own private beach. and we surfed all morning. then came back up and showered and went into town to explore. we rented some mopeds and scotty wiped out really bad and ended up spraining his wrist, we had to take him to the ER. then went out for lunch and checked out some of the local surf shops. then headed back home to the condo and hung out at the beach and played some v-ball and surfed some more but the morning waves are the best. it was just a lazy day. then that night we went out to some bars and had a blast. some stuff went down that i really cant write about but it was pretty shameful. but the next we did pretty much the same thing, beach, surf, fod, shop, town, drank, then packed up and drove home. i finally got home at about 3am and went to sleep. then had to be up for my lessons at 7 and then had classes till 2. luckily i dont have to work till 8. well thats all i got so peace!
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| this sucks... |
[28 Oct 2004|12:39am] |
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I've been so busy lately with classes and work. nothing exciting is going on. My sisters friends are in town, and to my suprise, its actually been fun hanging out with them. we all went to the beach this morning before my 11o'clock class and me and Kat surfed for about an hour and then i got my tan on! monday i went over to my boy's house for his little party, got piss ass drunk, not intentionally. it was just supposed to be a small thing, but a bunch of people ended up coming who i havent seen in a really long time. it was fun, played a few drinking games, and played xbox. we even went out to the parking lot and went skateboarding...never try to skateboard when your drunk, not a good move on my part. Well me and melissa are officially going out now. I'm veeeeery happy about that. I kinda asked her out when i was drunk tho which isnt really good, but thats ok. I just knew it was right. She's so amazing. i knwo you dont want to hear all my sappy feelings. well i leave for orlando on friday night. should be fun, kinda wish i was staying here tho. I'm gonna try and get mel to go to the keys wiht me next weekend. we'll see. I was watching coyote ugly on sunday night and i cant believe that i am saying this but thats a really good movie. just found out tbs is gonna be at bakesale...sweeeeeeet! me and mel got into a fight tonite, first one except for the one we had before we went out. its my fault, i acted like a dick, and mel i just want u to know i'm sorry. g'night youngins!
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[24 Oct 2004|03:27am] |
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hmm can we say boring. did absolutely nothing this weekend but study and work. i'm over all of it. i need to go away for a while. i need a break. luckily i dont have to work tomorrow. i'm goin to the beach when ever my lazy ass wakes up. and then me and Kathryn are going to our parents house for dinner. in between the beach and dinner i hope to go hang out at nicks or at patricks with bradley. michelle and stacy should be coming down this monday from ucf to see kathryn so i'll have all my sisters dumb friends over, should be a blast, or not. i'm in such a negative mood. wanted to be able to go out and have fun this weekend but that didnt happen. melissa saw the grudge tonite and i'm kinda upset that she didnt wait to see it w/me but she said she liked it even tho it scared her shitless, so she said she'd see it again, so thats straight. aiight so i have nothing to write about. next weekend should be goin up to oelando and then the following weekend patricks parent said we could go to their condo down in the keys, so it might be a male excursion to the keys..lookin foward to that. welp i'm out..peace ya'll
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[21 Oct 2004|07:07pm] |
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I really hate depressing stuff but right now thats all i have to talk about. lets start with the fact that my body has been on overdrive and its just now starting to get back to normal. School blows. Bombed a test the otherday, i guess it just shows i need to work harder on my study habits. I got up today and had a lesson this mornin then had classes and then went to work at the shop. and guess what tomorrow i just get to do it all over again. i've got a paper due on tuesday and i dont even know where to begin. i hate not knowing my schedules for work. i never know when i am working untill last minute, so i try and make plans and then end up feeling really bad when i have to cancel them last minute. but its not intentional. so far its looking like i'll be heading up to orlando next weekend for my sisters birthday, nothing is set in stone yet. i really wish i could be in two places at once, that would be so rad. like i could go to classes and be at the beach surfing at the same time. maybe i'll change my major and become a scientist so i can figure out a way to make that really happen. then i could be insanely rich and own every beach i ever wanted. holy crap balls thats SWEEEEET!!! well i'm out...PEACE!!!
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[19 Oct 2004|12:50am] |
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I feel so much better now. went to nicks tonite, hung out there for a while and played x-box. then called melissa who was at target with her mom, and went over there and met up with her. we played around with the costumes, cant wait to see her as a naughty nurse, i might not be able to contain myself..lol. maybe we can play doctor
::innocent grin:: then i bought her the new sum 41 cd, and surprised her with it on the way back to her house. but before we went back we went to Bru's Room and i got an appetizer and we both shared a dessert, it was yummy. i fed her some and wiped it on her cheek to lick it off. she was so funny. she doesnt like all the public mushy stuff. we had a nice talk and then i took her home. i'm liking thses little visits.
So i have a lot of work to do still so i better be going.
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| I need a pick-me-up! |
[18 Oct 2004|06:13pm] |
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Today was so overwhelming. Gave a few lessons this morning, ran late and didn't have time to go home and shower before class so i went to class in my boardshirts smelling of the ocean, not that that is a bad thing, i think its the best scent ever, but i prolly looked like a bum and shit. went by dereks for a while between classes and we went out to panera bread for some grub. I have so much shit to do. all this school work that i've been putting off. thank god i didnt have to work today at either job so i had some time to get some stuff done. I'm in the weirdest mood right now, i'm exhausted from school, i need a vacation. i always listen to this song when i'm down, it cheers me right up.
Fenix-tx~"surf song"
Hanging out at the beach one day
And I heard someone say that if
I Was cool
I'd be surfing
That's when I decided
I wasn't gonna be some punk kid
Gettin sand kicked in his face
And losin all the chicks
I wish that I was cool
I wish I was surfing
Making beach babes drool,
I wish I was surfing
And every single day
I would be surfing
I wish that I was cool
I wish that I was surfing
I went out and bought me a board
I even got me a bungee cord
So I'd wipe wipe out I won't lose my board
how much practice can it take
I mean I've already seen "Point Break"
And if Keanu can do it
Then I can too
You know that I don't mind
Hangin' out and wasting time (Yeah Yeah)
Starin' at the sea all day
Waitin for that perfect wave (Yeah Yeah)
I wish that I was cool
I wish I was surfing
Making beach babes drool,
I wish I was surfing
And every single day
I would be surfing
I wish that I was cool
I wish that I was surfing
(Yeeeeaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh)
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| my night is complete |
[18 Oct 2004|02:55am] |
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Lets see here. What did I do today. nothing really, gave 3 surf lessons in the morning and then headed over to Nick's place to hang out. spent most of it online like the loser that I am. Nick had the worst hang over ever..and i wasn't doin to well either. I was in Delray so i decided to pop on over to melissa's to see her since i "sold out" last night. All i have to say about the time i spent over there was "HEAVEN". we attempted to watch a movie, but well...things happen. all i know is..my night is complete. i made a myspace today..it looks sweeeet. thanks to julia for the liger pics, and melissa for making the backround and the music. tomorrow i have a lesson in the a.m. and then classes and then work. should be tons of fun. well later peeps
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| I'm officially a loser |
[17 Oct 2004|03:23am] |
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I'm such a loser. ok here is what went down. derek's 21st b-day bash was today and i went to his bbq thing and went in the pool and all that good stuff and i drank wayyyyyyyyy to much. we played some fun drinking games and played b-ball in the pool. it was straight. was gonna go to the senses fail show but i was pretty out of it and couldn't drive. and noone elses wanted to go so we all headed down to south beach and walked around some, it was pretty lame. i would have rather gone to the show since i'm a show whore and all. but i had to stick wiht the guys tonite. derek only turns 21 once and we had to go out with a bang. speaking of bang. this chick caitlin who he had a little crush on for a while came to the party tonite and lemme just say this. they disappeared into a room for a while, GOOD JOB derek! thats mah boy!
Shades Apart - Chasing Daydreams
Watch the night sky at my window
While the world is fast asleep
I stare into the unknown
I will have no fear as long as you're with me
I will catch your fall- I'll keep the world away
Chasing after daydreams- I am unafraid
Catch me if I fall- in your arms I'm safe
Chasing after daydreams
World gone mad outside my window
Try to buy a higher life
I won't need another thing
I will go on dreaming if you stay with me
I will catch your fall- I'll keep the world away
Chasing after daydreams- I am unafraid
Catch me if I fall- in your arms I'm safe
Chasing after daydreams
Let them tell secrets about us
Jaded words don't mean a thing
We are just beginning
There's no limit we will go on chasing dreams
I will catch your fall- I'll keep the world away
Chasing after daydreams- I am unafraid
Catch me if I fall- in your arms I'm safe
Chasing after daydreams
~you know who you are;)
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[15 Oct 2004|07:46pm] |
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Yo Yo Yo! So I decided to start one of these things to be "scene". haha riiiiight. no i thought it would be pretty cool. plus i'm so nosy i want to see what goes on in other peoples lives since i have nothin better to do. so whats been going on as of late? not a whole hell of a lot. been doing the usual. work, surf, skate, drink, bein stupid. so tonite i'm going to nicks with derek and chad and patrick and we'll probably just drink and watch movies and play ps2, b/c we are losers like that. tomorrow night me and nick are headin down to lake park(yay all the fuckin way down there)to see Senses Fail at kelsey club, and silverstien, should be rad! plus i'll get to see melissa. i'm bringing nick, derek, chad, patrick, scotty, and sam to the show with me. nick wants to go to see melissa, and i told her today and she said she aint real thrilled w/that but oh well, she'll get over it...she needs to not be so damn emo!!!!!!!!!!well wiht that thought i'm out....
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